Making Time For Pleasure

When everything is just too overwhelming and life seems to be racing in a zillion directions, how do you handle it? Do you drink more coffee, try to do more, stay up later, get up earlier, or break down? Do you let stress build and ignore it? Do you just stuff your face with sugar like I do? It's a huge challenge to stay focused and prioritized, and to make the time for rest and balance in these times. We have so many mediums of communication all vying for our attention, not to mention careers to work, families to tend to, functions to attend, plans to make, appointments to keep. The list goes on and the stress seems to mount, until we find ourselves either sick or in breakdown somehow. I see many people who seem to wait until they're sick for a small break, and then they jump back up before they're even ready to go back into the ring for more. It's scary to watch. I can't help but wonder if they are truly happy, or just afraid to stop. For some, I'm sure that staying in the game full frontal brings them joy, but this isn't not true for everyone. The perfect antidote for stress is pleasure. Nothing gives us more of an "ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" feeling. It doesn't really take much if we learn to breathe and center our attention on our hearts, get present with the moment, and then feel into it. I don't believe that pleasure can happen when our minds are racing in the opposite direction. Ever tried to completely relax while running? Doesn't work that well, does it? You have to get the mind to stop, drag it back to where your body is and sync your system up with the now. Only then can you really be with whatever pleasure you're offering yourself. One of the more advanced routes to pleasure is associated with our sexuality, and in a pinch our sexuality can be channeled into any activity and then it becomes sensuality, which is highly pleasurable. Pleasure in eating something delicious, feeling the sun on your face, getting a shoulder rub, stretching, looking at beautiful art or photos, listening to gorgeous music...these are all so pleasurable. If we focus on feeling our bodies respond as we enjoy these activities, we are officially having a sensual experience. This is where the pleasure we are feeling can light up our brains, our groins, our whole physiology, and we are healing, opening, and receiving the relaxation and rejuvenation we crave. In the book, The Pleasure Zone, Resnick lists the 8 fundamental pleasures as being primal, pain relief, play, mental, emotional, sensual, sexual, and spiritual. The last three can "be thought of as the consummate realms for reaching your pleasure potential", she says. Take some time out for pleasure today and if it feels good try it daily for a while

. I would love to hear back from you how it affects your life.

Falling in Love With Your One Precious Body

You’re thinking that this is downright impossible, and you’re not even sure you want to anyway, right?! I hear you, sister. You and I have been programmed at a young age to view our bodies as shameful vessels of imperfection. Cross your legs like a lady, cover any natural body scent with artificial fragrances, and be nice are the messages we receive. Be polite, coy, and agreeable. Learn to cook and get a career to pay for everything. In fact, learn how to do everything so that any man you’re lucky enough to snag will be completely cared for, nurtured, and thrilled at how easily you cooperate and pop out a family for him while you bring home the bacon and craft it into a gourmet creation. No muss no fuss! Have I got your attention?

We women have private parts that are unmentionable. Most of us have never even seen them, and we sure as heck aren’t supposed to touch them. Many don’t know what’s where, what it’s for, or what it looks like. We’re actually afraid to look because we’ve gotten the message loud and clear that it’s abnormal, probably ugly and likely smelly. Spoken or unspoken, that’s the general pulse of our overly showered, disinfected, and perfumed culture.

Along with that message, we’re barraged with images of airbrushed, painted, and perfectly coiffed role models who can afford every type of medical enhancement invented, and have a team of stylists following them around. Not only are we ill equipped to compete, but we’re told that if we don’t emulate these icons, we are worthless and invisible. It’s depressing and deflating and invokes self loathing.

Before I lose you, I’m swinging into what you, the glorious and gorgeous creature that you truly are, can do about it! It would seem hopeless, but I have full faith in you because many of your sisters have already jumped on the bandwagon of the divine feminine revival recently. We have figured it out and are pioneering the exquisite landscape of self love with an exuberance that’s contagious. I am here to welcome you with open arms…please join us!

For the next few articles, follow me while I lay out a plan for not only working up the courage to look at that precious vehicle you were born into, but for falling in love with every single inch. For now, please begin by either putting on hand lotion or lip gloss each and every day. Find one silky or luxurious item to don often, just for the feel of it. Trust me. One baby step at a time, my beautiful creatures of divine femininity and miraculous good fortune…you landed here, didn’t you? You’re a genius!

Gorgeous Skin ~ Oceana's Hottt Tips

People consistently comment on my skin. They remark that I have hardly any wrinkles and my skin is beautiful. Thank you Peeps! I suck in compliments like a sponge and absorb as much pleasure as possible from each and every one. I highly recommend learning to receive a compliment, as it is a true gift to the giver.

That said, I have decided to divulge my “secrets” for beautiful skin. With a background in cosmetology, yoga, herbalism and aromatherapy…not to mention a mother who had a penchant for vitamin supplementation, I now give you the full monty on how I do it.

10 pointers from a tantric yogini that will keep your face dewy, fresh and lovely all winter:

1. Drink plenty of water daily and take your vitamins.

2. Never use really hot water on your face, only warm or cool. Your skin will retain its moisture better, and besides, hot water is just too harsh.

3. Eat your MUFA’s…monounsaturated fatty acids…flax seeds, avocado, olive oil, dark chocolate, evening primrose oil, cod liver oil, nuts and seeds. Nourish your skin from within and get healthier while you’re at it.

4. Retinol is the only stuff that has been proven to make a difference in diminishing lines and wrinkles over the counter. When you use it, be sure to use sunscreen as well to avoid burning this newly sensitive skin. You can purchase a retinol cream for about twenty bucks at the drugstore without a prescription.

5. Vitamin C is key for gorgeous skin. Find a vitamin C serum or cream and use it to continue to help the old skin cells fall away to reveal the fresh new skin underneath. You’ll be amazed after only a few weeks at how much fresher and vibrant your skin looks.

6. Once in a while, warm up some sesame oil after you’ve cleansed you face and gently massage in upward circular motions. Deeply moisturizing and detoxifying, and leaves your skin oh-so-soft. Also a great detox. Use the organic, untoasted sesame oil, or try virgin olive oil, apricot kernel oil, or avocado oil if you want varied moisturizing and vitamin effects.

7. Practice yoga. Your circulation will benefit, your body will detox naturally, and the relaxation will unfurl your brows, causing less wrinkles. Speaking of yoga, tantrikas know that a practice of self pleasure will keep your skin glowing and prolong your life. Continue to work with the chi, folks.

8. Do a weekly steam facial with herbs, a pot of boiled water, and a towel over your head. Follow with a mask from the kitchen. Avocado mashed with yogurt, or oatmeal or just mashed strawberries work well. Eggs make great facial masks if you apply yolk first, let dry, and then whites over it and let dry. My favorite one is honey with a drop of rose essential oil for intensive moisture. Honey is a natural humectant and your skin will be softer than you can imagine afterwards.

9. Sleeping Beauty was gorgeous cuz she slept so much. Get yourself enough beauty rest, darlings. Oh, and did I mention fresh air and sunshine? That too. Mother did know best.

10. Last but definitely not least, try out some of my seriously gorgeous facial elixirs and bask in the exquisite sensory experience…essential oils are my secret to young skin. Indulge in a special blend by me and put your best face forward!