Is Turning Heads An Outside or Inside Job?

Magazine covers would have us believe that beauty is an outside job, and yet our spiritual leaders tell us it all comes from within. I don’t know about you, but it leaves my head in a tizzy! I’ve tried every hair color, every type of makeup, dressed myself in every fashion to hit the runways…and unlike the majority, I’ve also studied spirituality from Christianity to paganism and everything in between.

As they say in Maine, ya can’t get they-ya from hee-ya. What I mean is that as women, we search constantly for a way to attract attention from that special one or many and end up either beautifying ourselves to exhaustion, or giving up completely and neglecting ourselves. Does this sound familiar?

I dare say I have untangled the confusing information, which I am downright elated to clarify with you here. It’s something so obvious and simple that I’m flushed that it hadn’t dawned on me earlier. The truth is that it’s not just an outside job and it’s not just an inside job…it is BOTH

My personal background includes modeling and cosmetology which are outside jobs. For twenty years I spent most of my time looking in mirrors, primping myself or someone else, expertly assessing my client’s features, taking clothes on and off, strutting down runways and posing for photographers. I listened to a multitude of women commiserate about their hair, their looks, their boyfriends, husbands, their sex lives, their weight, and their careers. They told me secrets reserved for therapists, and then some. The amazing thing is that without exception, after an hour in my chair of being professionally coiffed and primped, they would leave feeling more beautiful. They sat down, got inner and outer attention and acknowledgment, and left feeling wonderful and radiating more beauty.

The noticeable thing about a woman who feels beautiful is that she carries herself differently. She smiles more, is conscious of her body and how she’s holding herself, and looks others in the eye with confidence. A woman can take herself from invisible to queen in minutes just by carrying herself with poise.

Sometimes a woman would come in with her hair an absolute mess, and the transformational mix of hair color, cut and styling would be stunning. Seeing her transformed physical appearance would shift her emotions about herself and then her self esteem would soar. At other times a woman whose physicality was breathtakingly beautiful would sit down for me to work on her, and inside of ten minutes her negative attitude would literally change my perception of her and she would appear considerably less attractive bordering on ugly.

It’s up to us how we use the power we have in our hands as women. We don’t have to wait for someone to tell us how gorgeous we are (although it never hurts!). We can do it ourselves. Also, we have the choice of whether to slip into something sexy, touch up our lipstick, and dab on some perfume or simply carry ourselves as if we own the room with the magnetic secret between our thighs. Beauty is not an either/or proposition…it is an exciting blend of both that we have access to at any time.